Of Faith, Belief & Trust

ABHA IYENGAR

It is important to work with trust, belief and faith. It begins with faith in yourself, and then having faith in others. This is especially important in the relationship between two partners who aim to go through life supporting and being with one another.

When we commit ourselves to a relationship, we are putting the proverbial stake on the ground. We claim it to be something that matters to us.

It all begins with self-belief. If you don’t believe in yourself, it’s hard for others to believe in you. Our belief and trust in ourselves makes us confident risk-takers, and this is why we step into a relationship in the first place, because we have faith in our love for the other person and faith in our abilities to make the relationship not only work, but thrive.

SYNERGY

The synergetic effect of two people committed to one another and a common life view are amazing. When we trust ourselves, we begin to trust others. We are not insecure, ‘Doubting Thomases’ with our minds riddled with suspicions and mistrust. We get into a relationship trusting our partner with our life and our dreams, our ambitions, and our emotions. We are assured that our partner reciprocates similar feelings and a commitment to the relationship. As long as this situation remains, there is harmonious well-being in the household.

It is when doubts and suspicions begin to creep into a relationship that things begin to fall apart. No longer do we work with each other towards common goals based on trust and love for each other. Jealousy rears its ugly head. Mistrust enters the eyes. The speech is biting and harsh. There is a lack of understanding. Bitterness laces the relationship; it loses its earlier flavor of sweetness and harmony. Accusations and recriminations fly back and forth, and there is no give-and-take anymore. The family structure begins to crumble, and the relationship is now in a shambles. Nothing remains of what was before — all because of the loss of trust in each other.

SPEAK UP

If there is any misunderstanding between two partners, it should be cleared up immediately. Often the lack of communication creates such misunderstandings. One person says something, but it is taken to mean something entirely different by the other.

Problems have a tendency to escalate — so the old saying that “one should not carry a grudge to bed” has truth in it. It is better to sort things out right at the beginning of doubt and clear the air. If there is a wrongdoing, that too can be understood and forgiven. The relationship begins on a fresh footing again.

However, if the trust is lost forever, the whole meaning of the relationship goes for a toss. When this happens, there is no option but to part ways, since lack of trust is like a slow poison that eats into the mind and soul.

There’s yet away. When we reach out to the person we want to share our life with, it is an act of faith. It is up to us to hold on to this belief with our hearts and mind and nurture the relationship — to achieve love, peace, and harmony in our lives.